Category Archives: Self Improvement

Its Up To You: People’s Opinions Don’t Matter.

Many different people offer their opinions about you and you should not care!

People will hate. They will be there to judge and criticize you. They always have. It literally does not matter what you do, whether you post a picture of yourself on social media, behave differently from them, how you dress, how you speak, how you address certain factors in this reality, they will have an opinion on every single thing. People will share their negativity, just to satisfy a need within them. They do not like to see you thrive and achieve things that they cannot, so instead they splash some negativity on a positive thing.

“Your opinion is not my reality.”- Steve Maraboli

We allow other’s opinions and perceptions to define us and control how we do things, but at the end of the day, that is just the role of society. The constant judgement and attacks, can be compared to an army of ants, seeking for something to feed off on. It’s a simple comparison but an effective one, that will enable you to give you a better image of how the masses baseless opinions is being thrown at you.

Opinions have no purpose, other than to hurt or harm you. Other’s opinions of you does not matter. They have no sense in the entire being that you are. They do not matter. It can be hard to not be triggered emotionally by hurtful opinions, but you a human being. You have emotions just as the person next to you or in your personal life.

Walk away from negative opinions and perceptions people have of you.

You would agree that it is easy to think that those opinions do not matter and that they do not define you, right? Yes, it is quite hard to put in practice.

Keep your head up high. Turn the other cheek. Do not give other the pleasure of insulting you. Do not allow their irrational energy shove you down a slippery slope and stir you into a hot boiling bowl of anger.

An rating scale of approval cannot define your self-worth. No matter what inconsistent, irrational trolls can say about you, it does not define your self-worth. They do not know what you have been through. Have they been in your life? Do they know your story? Their opinions do not matter. Trust yourself: You know yourself. There is not rating of approval in this broad universe that can determine how you should act, create or be yourself.

Opinions make you depressed and sombre. That is enough reason to never pay attention to other’s judgements and opinions about you. There is no doubt in the world that you would want to go around feeling melancholic. Do not try to please everyone with your decisions. People do not care about you! It is improbable to please someone with your decision, because no matter what decision you make in your life, someone is going to be upset and have an opinion on how you can change your direction on the decision you made and they will judge you effortlessly, on what you do for your career, social media, education, children, the places you go to or even who you associate yourself with.

If they speak about you behind your back, they your secret group of fans.

Do not cater for other people’s opinions. You do not have an additional pen and notebook for every single being out there to address their opinions of your decisions.

You only have one notebook and pen for your OWN views. Other’s opinions do not matter.

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How to deal with negative ‘adulting’ positively

The phrase “Adulting is hard” is common amongst the millennials so much that when I asked one of my friends why they would rather choose the ‘good old days’ of being a child than now- they mentioned all sorts of things. Such as having fewer worries on what to wear, having someone to think on their behalf (are they hungry or not) most of all, someone paying the bills.

Sure, the elixir of life and living forever young sounds enticing, the idea of singing Avril Lavigne’s Never growing up at the top of our lungs in the AM’s after a night out sounds good too however if we all stayed in one place the rest of our lives, none of us would know the thrill of test driving your new car, or getting your driver’s licence or bagging your degree or getting your first paycheck or renting your first apartment (decorating it is the best part). There is so much to look forward to in adulting and yes it might throw us off from time to time but it’s all for our learning!

Now that I have possibly chided you from the fantasy of wishing to be a child again, here are 5 optimistic reasons why WE SHOULD GROW UP!

1.Adulthood means a 2.0 version of you

When hearing the words ‘you need to grow up’ most people often think of major life changes such as a sudden change of wardrobe, a drastic weight change, getting rich overnight or the dreaded one, dating – although these may sound ideal and fitting. Adulthood, however, includes little of these. If anything, Adulting is more about finding your values and opinions. It is discovering that you enjoy your cereal soggy regardless of what the majority says. It’s finding out what works and what doesn’t. Think of adulting as a personal ‘self-care Sunday’ except it is every day and it does a damn good glow-up for you and those around you!

2. You become more selfless

Selflessness is probably the last act of humanity children know because from birth everything is circled within parameters of their comfortability and satisfaction. When grown, however, you begin to put yourself in other people’s shoes more. This makes it easier to understand people. Being empathetic doesn’t necessarily mean being a good Samaritan- it’s being open to helping people in whatever way you can simply because it leaves a good feeling of happiness.

3. You learn from your mistakes

Growing up is like being handed an eraser to your past- every day is a new opportunity to rewrite the past in a new brighter colour of your choice. It is a chance for you to outgrow your shortcomings- like how you know now that orange is not the best choice for your hair colour. To grow is to build new moments, and to focus on the YOU that is right there while working on the YOU that is yet to come. Embrace the mistakes but don’t hoard them- they may burst and make a mess.

4. You are most comfortable when being yourself

Fortunately growing up does not come with tangible instructions- otherwise, none of us would be original, we would all copy each other. Have you noticed how comfortable you get around friends and family you grew up with as opposed to people you have just met, this is because people naturally like to be liked and first impressions are important thus at times we may behave awkwardly or do things we never would do just to be perceived ‘cool’ In adulthood, however, being yourself is the one trick up your sleeve you will ever need, trust me!

5. You become more open to change and its challenges

Mainly because the future is exciting. You become more driven to partake in things that will you put you in a more advanced position a year from now. You worry about your future & therefore start making positive contributions towards it. The candid truth of growing up is realising that EVERYTHING is entirely up to you. Yes, being a grown-up comes with freedom however, that comes with great responsibility. Knowing that your entire future is in your hands could be adrenaline stimulating or be nerve-wracking to the pits, there is no in-between. Love it or hate it, Adulting is one of the priceless transitions in life (plus you get to relate to the tv show Insecure and drink wine whenever!) keep growing into adulthood with these every day motivating quotes.

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